soulja blog

we all know who the "it's the mirrors" girl is, right? did you know her name is bella thorne, she is 10 years old and likes to color? isn't that the crazy thing about advertising? i bet everyone knows who the "it's the mirrors" girl is but no one even knows what she's selling or, more importantly, that she likes to color. i know she's selling tv's but have no clue what kind of tv's. you could also send me to a school 24/7, 5 days a week where all they do is teach a class explaining how the mirrors work and i would never understand it...and this makes me sad :(
what the heck is a "soulja boy?" is it a dude's name, a song or a dance? is he a soldier or is it a soul thang? i'm not sure what's worse - that i have no clue what a "soulja boy" is or that i'm so obsessed with knowing everything that is pop culture that i'm actually gonna' type "soulja boy" into the wikipedia as soon as i'm done blogging this blog.

i'm obsessed with hair. not in the way where i primp in the mirror for hours on end but in the way where i'm obsessed with other dude's hair. some guys are just born with crappy hairlines, weird textures or baldness and there is nothing they can do about it. some people's hair looks great even if they wear a hat all day or have just woken up. i'm so jealous; hair can make or break a guy and i'm all broke when it comes to hair. i want to grow my hair out long but it's getting to thin. however, when i cut it short, my head looks huge and square. it seems like good and bad hair is broken down by ethnicities too. white hair is a complete crap shoot; except for european dudes - i think they have the best hair. mexicans and asians have the worst. mexicans have crazy hairlines with like eight widows peaks or absolutely no foreheads because the hairline is so low. asians' hair is just way too straight and sits too high on the head. except for my filipino pal g-lu, i've always liked his hair- it has a nice texture. i'm conflicted when it comes to black dude's hair. i'm jealous because they can go completely bald and still look a million times better than a guy with a full head of hair. but, at the same time, their nicest hairstyles prohibit them from washing their hair for weeks on end. their hairlines are a little too much for me too. i swear you need a t-square and protractor to get all those crazy angles.

what's with all these movies and tv shows where people just fall into being spies or were spies in former lives but have amnesia? i guess it started with "alias" and then you have all the "bourne" movies, the tv shows "chuck" and "the bionic woman" and now those new movies coming out "wanted" and "hitman." i just think that's eveyone's fantasy where they have amnesia or something where it turns out they have some awesome job or skillz that they know how to do by instinct but have zero recollection of all the hard work they had to put in to get to that point. i want a movie/tv show where some guy has amnesia and it turns out he was a greeter at walmart and he slowly but surely eases back into his job only to commit suicide because he's so crestfallen that he wasn't some government experiment, killing machine in his previous life. editor's note: the blogger hasn't actually seen any of these movies/tv shows so he could be wrong about all this.

ba dum BLOG!!!