ba dum BLOGger has no "game" vol. 6

bloggers like me (losers) need a great deal of circumstance and luck to get chicks. we aren't going to a bar and handpicking the belle of the ball, slinging her drunken body over our shoulder and bringing her back to our den. we just can't. we gots no "game." this means when we have an opportunity of circumstance we need to pounce and pounce hard. whether it be a cute girl in the cubicle next to us, a hot chick in class or a literal girl next door (or a few doors down) as in a neighbour; these situations provide bloggers like me (losers) to organically get to know a girl and woo her in a low pressure, unthreatening way. of course, nine times out of ten, this leaves us in the dreaded "friend zone" but it's better than being mocked and made fun of, ten times out of ten, at bars. this is why it still sticks in my craw to this day when i couldn't open or close the deal with a couple of neighbour girls a few doors down. so, if you'd please indulge me as we (my reader and i) take a ride in the way back machine to about two years ago (give or take a year...).

so, my roommate and i had just moved into a new apartment and whilst our apartment manager was going over the particulars she let us know that we may be getting a fair amount of mail for the girls who used to live in our place but have since moved a few doors down. of course, my desperate/opportunistic wheels start a-turnin' and before i could even get my hands on that mail i decided that once i got their names from their mail that i'd plug them into myspace and see what we're dealing with. diabolical? yes. creepy? perhaps. stalkerish? probably. something that every guy would do if they had the foresight and were genius enough to think of but would never have the keep-it-realness to admit? indubitably: stone cold, lead pipe lock of a fact. so, i found their myspaces, which weren't "private," (which immediately earned them 10 "cool chick points") and were both attractive (but not too attractive) and single! i couldn't ask for a better situation!!! however, a bigger discrepancy betwixt great situation and huge loser could not have occurred.

right from the get-go, our mail box was flooded with moderately attractive neighbour chick mail. and, for better or for worse (i'll let you guess which it is/was), my roommate was gone on business and not spending much time at our apartment so the onus fell entirely on me to deliver the mail and male. so here i am, literally knock-kneed, sweating and pacing in our apartment with a handful of moderately attractive neighbour chick mail rehearsing over and over again in my head what i'm going to say upon delivering said mail. of course, i already knew their names and what they looked like so i was scheming and racking my brains over something clever i could offer during introductions. well, there is no chance of them ever reading this so i'll let you in on their names since this is important to my clever quip i had chambered. their names were amber and ashley with the former having strawberry blondish hair and the latter with dark brown hair. can you see where i'm going with this??? my genius line, upon introductions, was to make the observation that their names and hair colours should be reversed since ashley has amber coloured hair and amber had ashy coloured hair. where else but http://www.badumblog.bogspot.com/ can you get this kind of candid, unadulterated insight into one of the internets' great minds?

so here i am, mail in hand and at the door. i ring the bell and one of the moderately attractive neighbour chicks answers (i think it was ashley), i introduce myself as the new neighbour, she introduces herself and calls amber to the door to meet me as well. we all exchanged pleasantries where i proceeded to metaphorically piss all over myself with nary a quip, nary anything except for me looking at the ground, mumbling my name and giving them a requisite "nice to meet you." of course, i now realize that it's best i didn't go with the hair/name line but, at the time, i had it chambered and ready to go and i still could've said something, right? of course, since i'm a neurotic head case, i never bounced back from this initial meeting and proceeded to just leave their mail under their door matt and continued to give muted "hellos" during our chance meetings in the halls. of course, me retreating to turtle shell mode was completely irrational and a total overreaction to nothing but i just couldn't stomach having anything more than a two minute conversation with the moderately attractive neighbour chicks. it just wasn't worth the aggravation and self-loathing. then again, they didn't show much of an interest in anything more than a two minute conversation either so it probably wouldn't have progressed any further anyway, right? but still...

so, yada, yada, yada they moved out a couple of months later and that was that. why is this relevant; other than having to fill blog space in a daily blog? because we just had some neighbours move out and, over the excitement of getting new neighbours, i was reminded of what not to do if we got another duo of hot, neighbour chicks. actually, i hope we don't. i know it sounds ridiculous but my mind just races and can't help but put all these ridiculous expectations and scenarios in play. does everyone's mind work like this or am i just the only one dumb enough to blog it? i don't know what i expected... i didn't have to get to second base with them or anything but we were of the same age and everything so we could've at least been friends, right? and then, they could meet my friends, i could meet their friends and we'd all have more friends by proxy. a very underreported part of graduating college is just how you took for granted that 90% of your friends have always come from school and now you're leaving that fertile crescent of social fertility behind. and, to be honest, i really haven't figured out how to make friends in a post-college world. i mean, i've made a few good friends through work but it's just not as easy. anyway, back to getting new neighbours, it would be nice if they were some guys or girls of similar age so their could be potential for friendship but i just know that it'll probably just be some loud armenian family who will stink up the halls with their potent food. you ever notice that? i think you can tell how long minorities have been in america by how much their food permeates the surrounding areas. the more pungent, the more fobish... just sayin.'

ba dum BLOG!!!

editor's note: daily blogging = quantity over quality.

the top 10 things i noticed from the debate (and you didn't) vol. 1

i don't have the chops to provide a real, comprehensive analysis of all things debates so i'll provide a more eclectic, gimmicky look at what i saw and heard (and, more importantly, what you didn't see and hear). besides, this thing has been analyzed and taken apart a million times over by now and i don't just merely want to hitch my blog to their professional, well written, analytical wagons and provide my ba dum BLOGateers with the silly, irrelevant and inconsequential underbelly of all things debated.

*blogged and listed in chronological order

1. john mccain bringing up ted kennedy: did anyone else get the sense that they had a coin flip backstage over who would get to mention ted kennedy's deteriorating health during the debates? i just find it odd that john boy would be the one to do it in lieu of o'bama since kennedy has kinda' been like his mentor and big fat white benefactor. or, was this just mccain politickin' and extending the proverbial bi-partisan olive branch? either way, it was awkward and strange.

2. wall street "bad," main street "good:" i can't tell you why but i found this whole wall street vs. main street thing very clever and effective. is this a common and known phrasing to distinguish betwixt the phat cats on wall street as opposed to the normal, corn fed lot on main street? since both candidates were using it and using it quite liberally, i doubt this phrase was just coined that night. either way, i was amused and every time someone said "main street" it made me think of disneyland :)

3. no commercials: really, no commercials??? it's bad for the debators, it's bad for the bloggers and it's bad for the economy. it's not like the debators are merely just standing their and reading a pre-fed speech off the teleprompter either. for one thing, they're standing, which isn't easy, and i'd imagine this is probably one of the most taxing ordeals you could ever put your brain through. we can't give these fellas one 10 minute break??? it's tough for bloggers too. i actually peed into a bucket in my living room just so i wouldn't miss anything. for that two minute span i almost devolved into a middle american and nearly signed up for the military and said a prayer. and, most importantly, it's bad for the economy. c'mon, the debate is a ratings bonanza... let's sell some shizz!

4. o'bama needs "hatchet, not scalpel:" i'd like to consider myself a wordsmith and finely tuned into all matters of word choice and diction. this is why i almost slid out of my seat when i heard o'babma say he needed to use a "hatchet, not a scalpel" in regards to fixing the broken economy. now, i believe phrases like this are chambered and decided upon with your handlers and speech writer type guys beforehand as opposed to just coming off the top of your head. but why a "hatchet and not a scalpel?" because barack has been accused of being an "elitist," meaning he hails from the world of academia, deals in nuance and gives thoughtful, wordy answers. now, who uses a scalpel? the educated and creative; doctors and artists use scalpels as it's a tool of fine, thoughtful movements utilized to dissect and carve. while a hatchet is an axe; a crude tool of broad, sweeping movements. injuns and rednecks use hatchets to hack wood, scalps and in-laws. this was o'bama eliciting thoughts of impulsive, decisive action as to distance himself from the world of academia and center himself on the political landscape to appeal to the thoughtless, fuddy duddies of america.

5. warshington's "orgy of spending:" see, he did it again!!! o'bama referred to the government's loose purse strings as an "orgy of spending." just like with before, he's centering himself and appealing to the undecided, right leaning contingency. when middle america hears "orgy," their jesus crosses burn an imprint into their chest. and here, o'bama is eliciting this feeling and attributing it to warshington, the current administration and republicans. orgies = sin, warshington = sin and republicans = sin. oh no, the republicans sinned!!! hell hath no fury on the economy like an angry god's scorn... must mean it's time for o'bama to ride in on his half white steed, clean house and give warshington back to jesus!

6. john mccain is NOT "miss congeniality:" john boy made this comment not only once but twice. of course, we all know what he was trying to say - mainly that he's tough and not one to go along party lines just for the sake of staying buddy buddy with "team republican" when there's some serious reform and presidential butt kickin' to be doled out. however, this was a curious phrase to turn since john boy's running mate, sarah palin, was named "miss congeniality" in a miss alaska pageant from the 80s. this begs the question: is it good or bad to be named "miss congeniality." will palin's congeniality compliment and make up for john boy's lack there of or did he make a booboo and add too much congeniality to the gop's ticket?

7. o'bama doesn't know the difference betwixt "tactic and strategy:" yes, john boy accused o'bama of not understanding the subtle differences betwixt the words when they debated the iraq war. i thought about it and i don't know if i know the difference either other than a "strategy" is something that fosters and comes before a "tactic?" anyway here's what www.dictionary.com has to say: "in military usage, a distinction is made between strategy and tactics. strategy is the utilization, during both peace and war, of all of a nation's forces, through large-scale, long-range planning and development, to ensure security or victory. tactics deals with the use and deployment of troops in actual combat." neat.

8. the battle of the bracelets: first off, i blame lance armstrong for all this bracelet nonsense; what started off as cute and kitschy has gone full blown ridiculous and annoying. as john boy is trying to rationalize the war in iraq he harkens back to a flimsy, rubber bracelet some mother of a fallen soldier gave mccain and asked him to "make sure her son's death was not in vain." but o'bama would not be outdone… nay!!! he busted out his own bracelet that another mother of a fallen soldier gave to him and asked to "make sure no more mothers have to go thorough this" - meaning dying for a phony war. this was easily the most embarrassing part of the debate. poor o'bama even had to take a beat and read off the name of the fallen soldier from his notes. also, how many bracelets do they think they’re given and how do they decide which one to use in primetime? i think o'bama should've just pulled up his sleeve and said "i have a bracelet too; it's for type 2 diabetes mellitus and it let's people know i may need a cookie or insulin if i am comatose" game, set, match: o'bama.

9. obama "taking them (pakistan) out": woah, o'bama does NOT like pakistan. it's as if he just threw a dart at the middle east to decide where he would take his macho, blowhardy stand just to show team republican that he wasn't a milquetoast, weenie. but, wow... when he actually used the phrase of "taking them out" even a macho, war mongerer like mccain looked shocked. did anyone else know about pakistan being such a rabblerouser??? i sure haven't. i've heard about iraq, iran, north korea and russia... but "taking them (pakistan) out???" like, woah.

10. o'bama didn't "um" or stutter: i found this the most impressive part of the debate. o'bama was an ummin,' stutterin' machine. do people realise how difficult a thing this is to kick? much less at a tension filled forum like a debate in from of the whole country. of course, all the "ums" and stuttering is because o'bama's brain is a churnin' with a bazillion thoughts and ideas at once, but still... on the other hand, john boy still spewed out one "my friends" and still hasn’t kicked that creepy arm thing that makes him look like he’s wading through a cold crick.

ba dum BLOG!!!

gaudy, empty trinkets of blog

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

swashblogging

am i crazy or is this whole mccain suspending his election and putting off the debate so he can save the economy just a case of good ol' fashion politickin'? sure, the economy is a big deal and needs to be fixed but can't warshington figure it out sans one senator and one congressman? is mccain going to make some grand errol flynn-esque, swashbuckling gesture where he swings into warshington on a chandelier, brandishes his musket, rapes a damsel and saves the economy? heck, maybe he will and is that important to fixing the economy but this just reeks of "following him to the gates of hell," "eliminating evil," macho, empty republican rhetoric. maybe this is what a leader does and mccain is right and genuine in doing so. i also might concede to the idea that my bias is getting the best of me in my skepticism of the maverick mavericking his way out of the debates and into belly of the beast that is the economy. still though, mccain's at an all time low in the polls and its supposedly because of the economy and this is his way of showing that "country comes first," his party blew it and he's willing to do whatever it takes to make it right. or, this could also be a whole production to make o'bama look like he doesn't care about the economy and is more concerned with his bid for president than for the country. however, mccain lost all benefit of the doubt when he crossed letterman by cancelling on him to save the economy all whilst chillin' with katie couric. i really don't know... do you???

pardon me if this has been mentioned or blogged before but sarah palin is rocky of the eponymously titled sly stallone vehicle, "rocky." not in the sense that she's an underdog and is going to win, like hillary tried to draw allusions to during her campaign (especially since rocky did NOT win). but in the sense that she's just some politically charged marketing ploy who was chosen and created in a smoke filled room of scheming suits. remember, rocky wasn't picked because he was the best, or even good – he was a tomato can, but because he was some working class dago (the italian stallion) from the streets of philadelphia (thank you, bruce springsteen) who the downtrodden people of philly could get behind - he was the "american dream." much like palin is a hot female, from a small town, has a big family, is a bible humper, hunts and is righter than dubya - the "republican american dream." rocky was merely supposed to put butts in seats, make the suits some money (not box) - that's it. just like palin was chosen to win the election (not actually vp) - that's it. sure, palin could end up surprising all sane minded people and turn out to be a competent vp like rocky turned out to be a competent boxer but shouldn't the bar be a little higher for second in command? actually, i can see it turning out a lot like "rocky" - palin surprises everyone with her skillz and moxy, still loses but gains enough momentum and the actual experience needed to be a real life political player and legitimately makes some real vp/presidential waves in the next four years much like rocky goes on to become a legitimate boxer, gets his rematch and eventually defeats apollo creed. ehhh, this doesn’t quite work, does it? consider this a daily blog space filler.

not done with the vp; the system is broke and needs to be fixed. the vp isn't a two month campaign boost but an actual job with real duties - especially when you're duties include being on deck for leader of the free world. but especially when the leader of the free world in question is a septuagenarian with a litany of health issues. so, this is what i propose: make the selection of vp occur after the presidential election in the same way the president chooses his cabinet. even my dearest and closest friend, who is a lifelong member of team republican, admits that there were AT LEAST fifty republicans who would've served as a better vp and that palin was chosen to merely galvanize women voters. while i'm still not sure what coating women with zinc to avoid rusting has to do with anything, i gathered his point through context, nonetheless. so, is being a political mascot make you qualified to be vp? nope! so, how about we do as i said with choosing the vp after the election and create an actual position of "presidential mascot" and good ol' palin can travel around to all sorts of rallies, sticker stops, etc. and bring along one of those t-shirt guns (she like guns) that you see at sporting events and make hay. and, barack could choose bono or something and he could sing his "uno, dos, tres, catorce" song and talk about aids in africa. or, we could just do as we did in the olden days and have the loser of the presidential election become the defacto vp. why not? maybe that could even serve as the first step in eliminating all this partisan poppycock and help do away with the hackneyed party system. or maybe i have no clue what i'm blogging aboot.

ba dum BLOG!!!

editor's note: we promise, we'll have a blog of levity tomorrow without the politics. and, ba dum BLOGger is italian and reserves the right to use all italian racial slurs in accordance with the n'word theory of owning it and taking away some of its juice.

the day the blogging died

september 23, 2008 will be forever known as "the day the ambiguity died." much like february 3, 1959 is known as "the day the music died" and september 20, 2008 shall be remembered as "the day two marginal celebrities survived while a publicist, a bodyguard a pilot and a candlestick maker, all of which are of little or no significance, died." neat, huh? anyway, back to the 'mos... yes, lindsay lohan and clay aiken have both emerged from their respective, not so secretive or furtive, closets. yay, good for them!!! seriously though, i love the gays. well, maybe i don't love them inasmuch that i hate all the wacko, religious zealots who loathe and condemn their bumpluggery and clambakery to hell or, at the very least, confine them to the darkness of their metaphorical closets of shame. either way, i'm on team "clayDo" and "LezLo" because when homosexual people don't come out and own themselves they are giving credence to the "don't ask, don't tell" attitude that implies they are wrong and should be embarrassed for being themselves and living their nonthreatening, nonimposing on your lives lives. you watch though; all the twenty-four-hour-a-day news network, talking heads will wax moronic saying things like "who cares how they live their lives?," "why do they need to make an announcement of their own personal affairs?" and/or "you don't see me bragging about how i hunt moose and use pretty words like 'dressing' to literally dress up the idea of gutting and skinning a still warm animal carcass." actually, i'm not that against hunting but the whole idea of "dressing" a moose is grosser than sodomy, right? at least sodomizing (or "gomorrahizing" - really gomorrah got off easy...) includes consent betwixt two, like minded human beings. look, i digressed and i know this is all very stream of conscious and scattershot but the important thing is that all you 'mos need to come out and come out with such extreme force that your calves cramp up and "closets" don't even exist anymore. in all sincerity though; more important than the economy, the war, mccain not knowing how to use computers or o'bama being an infanticidist is the fact that we have this whole group of people in america who are terrified of what their families, their friends, their bosses, their colleagues, their church, etc. would think of them if they merely just expressed themselves and their love for others with the same zeal and zest all us heteros are afforded. that is all... yay homos, boo closets... HISSSSS!

ba dum BLOG!!!

editor's note: yes, we know LezLo technically came out on sunday, september 21 on the loveline show but "the thirty-six-hour span the ambiguity died" doesn't have the same tambour to it.

futblog americano

do professional athletes wear deodorant? heck, i wouldn't. i think the best offense is an offensive odor. this strategy would probably work best in basketball since you're indoors and are bumpin' and grindin' (thank you, r. kelly) in a smaller, more confined and, dare i say, more intimate space. football and rugby would work too i guess; especially on the lines of scrimmages, piles and scrums. however, this may present problems in the huddle - maybe that's why donovan mcnabb was vomiting in the super bowl. but i would definitely do this and i wouldn't stop at just merely not deodorizing myself. perhaps, i'd bathe myself in a bleu cheese and sulfur cocktail, leave my jersey in a smokers lounge, eat some garlic fries and/or step in some doggy doo doo. just think of the psychological and physical advantages this would give me. would anyone be able to bring themselves to play tight d on me, box me out or post me up? i wonder if this would even be legal or if they'd create some rule because they were tired of cleaning the puke off the court. also imagine all the great nicknames that could be had like "stinky pete," "foul freddy," "hank the stank," "latrell the smell" or, if the whole team employed this, "the stenchmen." shoot, all i know is that if they threw some namby pamby zones at me to combat the stank that i'd bust that shizz with some smoove j's, yo!

we need to get rid of extra points in football. or, give them the appropriate nomenclature of "superfluous points," "redundant points" or, simply put, "a joke." futbol americano is undoubtedly the most perfect, seamless and well oiled machine we have here in the usofa. heck, i'd even contend that it's art and better than porno movies. and why is this so? it's because of the drama and that nobody really knows what's going to happen but, at the same time, completely obsessed with what will and could happen - hence gambling, fantasy and just simply watching the games (i literally watched nine hours straight on sunday - literally). then why is there a key, point earning component to the game that has a success rate of 99.7%? there is no room for "gimmes" in football. sure, we have the alternative point after option of the two-point conversion but coaches only choose this option 1% of the time and chiefly occurs in moments of desperation rather than in moxy and/or hubris (thank you, mike shanahan). the two-point conversion is good; how about we just eliminate the extra-point in lieu of this? some would agree with this, but the drama of choice and risk in deciding which point after method you'd employ is an integral part of it all. not to mention, it'd just seem redundant and confusing to see all these two-point conversions after five yard touchdowns. how about the extra point is moved back to a 30 or 40 yard kick? then, this would also be weird because a 20 yard field goal would be worth the standard three points while a 30 or 40 yard extra point would be only the one point. so, i say this: make the extra point 30 yards and eliminate the option of field goals under 30 yards and thus making the new red zone begin at the 30 yard line and renaming it the "four down zone." how say you?

ba dum BLOG!!!

live blogging of the first 45 mins. of the emmys

holy crap, i'm live blogging the prime time emmys which are brought to you by the academy of television arts and sciences. this just may be the least compelling blog i have ever blogged but i think this is something that real life bloggers do and when in the blogosphere, blog as the bloggers blog. this task won't only challenge me mentally but physically, as well. see, i'm already mentally tv'd out from watching nine straight hours of football and now i'm tacking on three more hours of emmy fun for twelve straight hours of tv - holy mackerel! not to mention, i only blog with one finger and am not sure i'm physically up to snuff to physically keep up with all the emmy comings and goings in a live fashion. so here we is: the emmys, live blogged by ba dum BLOGer at www.badumblog.blogspot.com - tell your friends!

*blogged earlier this evening*

800pm
- okay, some little montagey type thing with all these tv people saying silly quotes from famous tv shows and, incidentally, just ripped off my opening line of "holy crap" over and over again.
-here's oprah in a flowing red dress blowing hard and welcoming us to the show. and now she's quoting groucho marx about how educational television is: "whenever someone turns on the television, i leave the room and open a book." amazing, she's actually quoting someone other than another black person (racist?).
- ugh, the emmy's are being hosted by all the hosts who are nominated for best hosts in a reality show - howie mandel, jeff probst, ryan seacrest, heidi klum (eat it, tyra!) and tom bergeron.
- heidi klum is taller than all of them and wearing a suit.
- howie just made a sarah palin joke in reference to them having nothing to say. win or lose, sarah palin will go down as the biggest celebrity of 2008. - their bit is that they have nothing to say nor is anything loaded in the prompter (cop out). bergeron and klum are completely silent because they have the least talent.
- oh, that was the joke. it's their network (abc) so they're the ones speaking now. hah, klum made a joke about howie being a hypochondriac.
- they just brought up bill shatner on stage to bail them out and they ripped off klum's tux to reveal a sexy little black number (sexist).
- tina fey and a very pregnant amy pohler have just stepped on stage to say "hi" to all the other countries watching the show. they're both hot and funny... unlike me. amy pohler is also very tan which i didn't know was allowed... you know, to go into a tanning booth when preggers.
- oh, they're announcing the best male supprting actor in a comedy series. it's between jon cryer (gay), kevin dillon (cool), nph (gay), jeremy piven (hair plugs) and someone else i wasn't fast enough to type.
- piven wins! good for him, i guess. he reminds me of a less cool, less talented bob downey jr. without the sense of humour and good head of hair. piven is struggling in his acceptance speech and just made a ridiculous joke about being a roofer that bombed, which he acknowledged and then went on to make fun of the rambling, awkward opening from the four hosts.
- twelve minutes in, a commercial break and i don't think i can do this. i thought i'd have room for a lot more tangents and digressions but i've turned into stenographer with more typos per minute than words.

816pm
- bergeron and seacrest are sitting in the "seinfeld" diner and they show the scene from "the contest" (you know, the masturbation one) where they lay out the groundwork for... the contest. classic, i think larry david won an emmy for writing this episode.
- out comes julia louis-dreyfus. she kind of has a witch face buit she's still hot.
- oh, she's announcing best supporting actress in a comedy series (i need to quit being surprised by this). the noms are kristen chenowith (buxom) amy poheler (never seen anyone nominated from snl before), jean smart (who?), holland someone (who), vanessa williams (seen her naked in penthouse). jean smart wins from "samantha who?"... jean smart who??? lolzzz
- gotta take a crap.
- wow, my crap break was the exact same length (time wise) as jean smart's acceptance speech.
- i always though "samantha who?" was about an asian chick (you know, like samantha "hu") but i guess christina applegate is "samantha."

825pm
- probst and klum are talking about chicks and this segues into an awkward kiss betwixt the two... and now a clip from "desperate housewives."
- i've never seen this show. oh boy, all the sluts from wisteria lane are here. i think the only hot one is eva longoria.
- oh, they're announcing supporting actor in a drama. the noms are ted danson (hair peice), michael emmerson (creepy), zeljko ivanek (who), bill shatner (yawn) and john slattery (prematurely gray).
- zeljko ivanek wins! who???? for some show called "damages" what??? why didn't john slattery or michael emmerson win? at least i watch their shows ("mad men" and "lost," respectively).
- ricky gervais is on... YESSSS!!!! he has easily got to be the most talented person in the theater. gosh, he's funny. the brits just get it. he just introduced a montage of "funny" acceptance speeches. lolzzzz... NOT!!! show more gervais!!!
- nice!!! gervais is ripping steve carrell who has unserendipitously (i actually spelled this right the first time, thank you) ruined the character gervais serendipitously created in the british office. really, the british office is to the nba as the american one is to the wnba. i don't know how anyone can watch it after first watching the british one. i do really like the dawn character of pam in the american one though. she's soooooo hot
- i love her. i wonder if she's at the emmys.

841pm
- i give up. i'll never be a real blogger. i just can't type fast enough to interject all the things that make me an okay blogger instead of a horrible stenographer.
- besides, j-lo hewitt and hayden panetierre just came on so i'll need some time to myself.

900pm
- so, there you have it: the first 45 minutes of the emmys live blogged at www.badumblog.blogspot.com by ba dum BLOGger.
- i am a n00b, i have failed... pwn3d.
- i need a cigarette.
- even though i'm posting the blog on sunday night, this still counts as my first blog for the one day a blog era.

ba dum BLOG!!!